There was a phase of my life, that went through a years ago, broke me down, & some moment enlightened me too. Sometimes it was about growing with like Imtiaz Ali Rockstar movie. When I Ist time saw this movie on 70 mm screen, it is a coincidence (Itefaaq) that, I found many resemblance with my life, It look like I am seeing myself on 70mm screen. Except itinerary part of film.
There is a phase of my Life, I have no Job, in mid way I heart broken. I went every door where I had a hope to get a Job. But only got cipher. Even I also got opportunity to work but suddenly it slips. In that phase a lot of my self discovery, self motivation. A lot of learning, & a lot of heartbroken happen. She also left me in that time.
Sometimes there is you call it (introspection) is going on between my Heart & My Mind.
What the hell is going on with me? …Why me…? Why she left me alone ? Why she didn’t think all that stuff she told me. I really missed her. I want her to be in my life. I tried to concealed my emotions from her. When she talked to me, I showed that I am happy without her, even don’t think about her or miss her. But that is not real. I miss her every moment of my life. Hope she returned in my life. i.e. Fight is going on between my thoughts ….
My mind says she miss me a lot and but don’t want to confess this. My heart says she left; she never returned in your life, you are just wasting ruining your life for her. Move on….But My mind says how could it be possible to live without her??? How can I imagine my life without her. I miss her smile, Her innocence. I checked my call details, inbox, whats app… Probably she messaged me… At least msg me to ask How are you ??? What’s going on in your life? But she never msg me… She has changed a lot….
Some time I remember that moment when she was with me. At a time we make fun of each other. Talk innumerable number of things. We talked everyday at least 1 hour probably…. More than 1 hour… She promised me many things & vice versa…. But now everything is over…
When people read this post they thought he is mad or some kind of neural disorder happened with me.With everyone this kind of things happened; but that doesn’t me they lost their mind; their ambitions; goals….. I don’t know what happen with me.
Many times I tried that I don’t think about her. I tried to involve myself in work so I don’t get time to think about her. But I can’t stop myself . My mind understand all these stuff, but my heart doesn’t want to believe this… That she left me…Never returned in my life…
I always think that why me…. Why I am behaving like a child? Probably this is my infatuation towards her. Change with time. Why I don’t find all those qualities in someone else. Why I don’t try to believe that every individual possess some different quality. Try to see that in different view….Why I am so skeptical about it? If you don’t move on from this problem… Your life is in danger. Yours dreams will be shattered. Move on…. Otherwise you will perish it….
As I aforesaid when I am confused or fight is going on between my mind & heart….
This is the conversation… between my mind & My lovely heart…
Mind :- Why is my life becomes so complicated ? Why It becomes so difficult for me to understand myself & getting complicated with each passing day. Why me..?
Heart:- Stop analyzing your life. Live every moment. Up & downs are the part & parcel of everyone life. Don’t run away. See your surroundings You are not alone in this world. Everyone has some kind of problem.They fight it. Don’t become a complain box. Live it with cheer.
Mind:- Why I am so unhappy. When things don’t turned in my way. e.g.:- Take her example. Why did she left me.Why did she forget all her promise. I never thought a single moment one day she left me…. Whyyyyyy…?????
Heart :- Worrying has become your Habit, though you are not unhappy. She doesn’t left you. She is busy in her life. You are in your stuff. Sometimes you do irritating things.
Mind:- Why do good people suffer a lot ?
Heart:- Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people face trials, but don’t suffer. Leave it on time. It also change, then life becomes better. With all hurdle in your life … You just crossed them. These are all experience. Each day is a new day.
Mind:- I mean Is this experience useful. But she left me. I miss her..
Heart :- Man again you are missing her. She left you. Why are you not moving in your life. A wise man is one control his emotions. Be strong. Move on. See your surroundings. There is happiness. Try to catch it.
Experience is just a struggle. With every experience you learn new things in life. It check your patience level. It test your temperament & give you lesson.
Mind:- Why does my failure hurt more ?
Heart:- In everyone ‘s life success is a measure which is made by other. If your success don’t come as good for them, you are failure for them. See inside in yourself. If you satisfied with your work, that is a success for you. People don’t realise the struggle to get success. It is only you know that how difficult for you to do this. If you satisfied with your attempt, that is a success for you/ when you start feeling good in your failure/enjoying your failure it gives you pleasure, success & you don’t care for measurement.
Mind:- How should I motivated myself in a tough times/complicated situation ?
Heart:- You must have motto towards your life. Always think in a positive way. Negativity destroys you. Always think that how far you come rather than how far you have to go. Live in present, forget the past. If your present is good, you can make your future bright.
Mind:- How does I get the best result from myself ?
Heart:- Are you insane ? You idiot why you don’t want to understand yourself ? Why do you ask same question in different way ? What I aforesaid;
Face your Present Don’t repent on your Past. It hurt you. The time you waste don’t return. See your present, Live in present. Enjoy your struggle, that gives you experience & confidence to handle your crunch situation. Be ready for future.
Trust me; when I am upswing mood; my failure hurts or in a tricky situation; the whole conversation is going on between my mind & heart. I try to give a shot to this……
Lets see what happen….
So I am living this way…. When I
When your every right step go Wrong; Turn left….
I missssss her….heeeeeeeee haaaaaa…
Try to Move on…
Musing /Snapshot /Inner Voice of a "Journalist" 